This morning I went for a run and came upon a crab! I was stretching at the Pier and saw something quickly scurrying and at first glace I jumped thinking it was spider, then I took a closer look and saw the little guy moving across the sand sideways. They are so quick! I wished I had my camera in that moment, but he moved so fast the picture would have turned out blurry anyways ;) . It seems so contradictory but running gives me energy which is why I am up at all hours of the night writing this while my roomies are soundly sleeping. I sipped iced coffee with some Hersheys caramel chocolate creamer after running. We had bible study training this morning and the topic was: “Attentive to the Purpose of Study”. Here are a few quotes from the talk: “Scripture does not say to memorize it in your head, but to let it be held in your heart and to let it lead to transformation.” “Does your Bible knowledge humble you or make you feel superior to those who don’t know as much?” Eric (the speaker) also summed up the Bible in an interesting way. “The whole point of the Bible is faithless people being pursued by a faithful God relentlessly.” I know what God wants me to do, but by a lack of faith and trust I choose to do my own thing. This ends up being a horrible choice and even though I don’t deserve it, God is right there with his grace ready to pick me back up. He continues to pursue me even when I do not deserve it. Before moving into our passage study, Eric said, “Everyday we need to read it because our hearts are prone to wander.” I have been reflecting on this and I believe that regular Bible reading is something that I really desire to incorporate into my everyday life. I cannot rely on soley the church or even the talks and Bible studies here. God has so much that he wants to pour into my life and I am so thankful to have the Bible as one way to get to know Him better.
Kari and I had about an hour between Training and work, so we had a lot of rushing to do. Friday is the day that room check is done, so her and I cleaned the bathroom while our other roommates cleaned the room. Haha, I felt silly but I had to admit that I had never cleaned a toilet before. So Amanda kindly showed me how to do this task haha she looked at my discusted face as I was cleaning it and said well it isn’t the most glamorous job but it needs to be done. I joked that I had definitely done worse tasks at the hospital in clinicals.
At Wal-Mart it got to be pretty slow up front so Kari got to join me in claims. I taught her how to shrink wrap, write defective tags, and we even scanned and boxed up returns to mail back to the companies. We had fun and went back and forth from having funny conversations to deep ones asking tough theological questions. It was a good time for sure in the claims cage. J We all got free steak, potatoes, salad, and cake for dinner because our Wal-Mart won a safety or sales award or something. Thank you Wal-Mart!
So…I have come to realize that although these short past few weeks have brought much clarity and knowledge gained, I find myself being struck with many questions I had never considered nor pursued before. My mind hasn’t let them go, because I feel the need to find an answer. This has been a difficult thing for me because in my mind I’ve wrestled with so many tough questions. Tonight after a conversation with my room I came to the realization that there are certain things we don’t know and won’t know no matter how thoroughly we investigate. This is okay though because God is full of mysteries and while it is difficult to accept that there are things we won’t ever understand about the Lord here on earth, it is a beautiful thing at the same time that God is so above us that our human minds cannot wrap our brains around him. I’m asking God to help me find acceptance, contentment, and awe with the mystery he provides. These mysteries are so incredible to me because even a person of the utmost highest intelligence cannot figure them out.
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